GOOD INTENTIONS

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Here we are again. Another year ahead.

I used to think of new years as a wash, as just another day. But I was young and probably just liked being contrary. When it comes to new years these days, I feel an enormous sense of awe. Not the night itself of course - this year I was asleep by about 11 - but the days after. The in-between time before I'm back to work, and the days seem longer and I have time to think and dream and hope and wonder for the year ahead. And PLAN. I like to plan. I like the idea of resolutions and intentions because it reminds me of the bigger picture. They allow me to take a bit of control back from the day-to-day shambles I find myself in. Make active choices. Think about big-picture stuff. I like making small changes and refining things and working to be my best self. So hurrah for that!

It has been a pretty damn good year. I got a kick-ass promotion that's had me on my toes - writing lots and thinking more and feeling full. I saw the world - spending days alone in new places and days with friends in familiar places. I went on dates and felt loved and had quite a bit of fun with it all. It's been nice, really.

The main thing I'm hoping for in the year ahead is to TAKE IT SLOW. 'Slowly, slowly' as my friend Stella says. It's no small thing, but I feel like it has been a while coming. I'm desperate for some quiet. Slowing down for me means more time to myself, more time at home, more time to write, more time to think, more time to rest (my iron has been so low my GP has me on supplements). Slowing down from all the bustle will - I hope - give me some time to work at finding out what I want. There are other things too, of course. I hope to read more books and run twice a week and keep saving for a house, but they will come if I take it slow. Slow is the answer.

Writing it all out here always feels good - I have a record, I'm accountable. 2013 had me all wow, till 2014 washed me out but by 2015 I was working my way through. I like looking back…